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let's chase the summer and forget the world.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010!
HandWritten on; 12:11 AM

i have never felt so confused before, i dont want to move forward, i dont want to move backwards, and i dont want to stay at the same spot either. what the hell is wrong with me. what do i do, where do i go, and who will take me.

today is the first time i really realised how easy it is to give advice when you're an outsider, a third party. and how freaking difficult it is to even THINK when you're the one in it. i am usually the one giving advice, the one who has got lots to say. now, damnit, i dont have anything to say to myself, its either that or i have got too much to say to myself that im confusing myself. every day im convincing, persuading myself, while every day i feel myself becoming a less than ideal person, not someone i would like or think myself to be, and every day i hope i will be content. but i hate it when i can't even think.

what exactly is the best for me?